Come to the Caf?

So this is the second week in a row that right after class, I was asked by a student to come with them to lunch in the "Caf," which is their cafeteria. Last week I just said, "Sounds tempting, but no." I figured it was just a joking invitation.

Then it happened again and I said, "You asked me last week," to which the student responded, "Yeah, and I'll keep asking until you join us!" It's a funny situation, because I know that my students like me, but there's a difference between having them be chummy (they come in to just chat all the time) and them wanting me to join them for lunch.

This is a weird situation of course, because of the question of boundaries. On one hand, there are a lot of faculty that routinely have lunch with students, and so it isn't really that out of the ordinary. (Back when I was an undergrad, we would invite faculty to parties at times, and sometimes they would come, so who really knows where the boundaries are.) At the same time, there is a danger in being "too chummy" with the students. Luckily, I'm past one worry, in that they don't seem to have lacked respect for me even though I'm extremely easy going. That's one danger.

The other problem of course is something that is akin to "looking bad." This is not a huge worry, unless I would have lunch with them every day and clearly have too close of a relationship with the students (which would be frowned upon by both the administration as well as my husband). This is not a real worry either. I like the fact that even in the short time I've been here I have been able to build a good relationship with these students, since I know that it will stick with them forever.

Plus I like hearing them say things like, "Oh, when you teach that class next year it'll actually be a good one, unlike when we took it from [insert other professor name here]." That just makes me feel better.